In any event, the strip is fairly monumental, as it might be the closest I've ever gotten to figuring out what Sporkman is and why. Of course, I've gone on record as saying that I don't actually care what Sporkman is and why, so you can imagine that this story tangent probably won't get very far. Still, the fact that Sporkman isn't a carbon-based lifeform is pretty interesting, not that anyone should be surprised given that his skin is shiny and plastic. Now, some of you might say, "But John, aren't most plastics composed of carbon and hydrogen polymers? Even if he was made of plastic, Sporkman would still be a carbon-based lifeform." Technically, you'd be right - if Sporkman was made out of a plastic we know about. Clearly, with his invulnerability and odd strength, Sporkman's plastic is no ordinary plastic. Certainly it share properties with common plastic utinsels, but there must be more to Sporkman's skin than meets the eye (or microscope).

Believe it or not, I just thought all that up a second ago as I was typing it. I've seriously never considered why Sporkman was made of until now. All that aside, I'd say it's likely that Sporkman isn't actually a few billion years old - he just never had any carbon atoms to begin with. Were Sophie to try potassium-argon dating instead of radiocarbon dating, she might get a more accurate result.